This too shall pass

"This too shall pass."

If I was a more profound person this would be my daily mantra during my daughter's babyhood and toddlerhood.  But what I find myself really saying all day long is "oh, come on!" with my fully exasperated and tired voice.

This daily mantra started soon after my wonderfully easy daughter turned four months old when I realized that she will NOT sleep thru the night...ever.  Up until then, I had expected her to wake up every few hours to feed.  But once I moved her to her own room, tucked her in tight on her back and kissed her good night, I had hoped that she would at least sleep longer in between waking until eventually she slept all through the night.  Not so much.  Even now, over two, the second I fall into a deep sleep she wakes me up calling for me.  Oh come on!

During daytime, at first I would find myself exclaiming my mantra on our daily walks as she would throw her baby overboard, then her shoes, then her socks, then her bottle, then her snack, then her baby again, then her bottle again, and so on.  After about 19 months the tossing on the ground of everything did get better, especially when I told her that if it went on the ground she wasn't getting it back until we got home.  For the most part, this worked.  A suggestion I have to help new mom's from this frustration...is too attach everything to the stroller.  I don't care how you do it, just do it.  I don't know if it will work or not, but it is worth a try.  One thing that is a must, is if you bring a toy or dolly on the walk make sure it is big and brightly colored.  It is amazing to me how often something has gotten tossed overboard and I walked right over or past it until my wee one pointed out to me that the object of her love and devotion was gone.  ugghh! Oh come on!  I can't even count the number of times I have backtracked to find the missing loved one.  Including our walk today, this time it was her shoe.

Should I even mention the period from 8 months until 18 months during mealtimes and the number of times I would find myself exclaiming my mantra as she tossed food on the floor, spit it out, or just flat out cleared off the highchair or table top in one big swipe.

As all mom's know, we find ourselves exasperated numerous times throughout the day and night. Wishing ourselves to have more patience, more sleep and more control over what comes out of our mouths.  In reality, there is not a lot we can do other than try.  Try to have more patience, more sleep (it would help if I really did nap when she did), and try to have more control over our mouths.

I will say, that as the two year mark passes, it does get easier.  Sometimes the attitude from the wee ones are more frustrating because now they really do know what they are doing and saying, and will do it just to get your reaction.  But overall, life has gotten easier, more relaxed, less frustrating, less exhausting. After all, we do want them to be independent and have their own thoughts...right?

How can you love someone so much that can drive you so crazy at times? We punish ourselves when we have negative things escape our lips, when we get exasperated, when we want to walk away..even for a minute. We tell ourselves that we should and could handle our reaction better, after all they are just a baby and they don't know what they are doing.  We remind ourselves that the loves of our lives are just trying to figure this whole life thing out too. But what we really have to work on is allowing ourselves to not be the perfect Mommy, at least not all the time.  Give ourselves a break every now and then too.

No one ever said that being a parent was going to be easy, they only said that it was worth it.  And it is.  When my daughter tells me "Mommy, I love you.  You are very nice." like she did yesterday, it is all worth it.